The 7 Seven Year Itch part2
February 20, 2016


Trust     –     Let go     –     Observe     –     Faith

This is a chain reaction understanding triggered by my responses to letting Mustang off leash and wander a great distance, sometimes out of sight.  The root of the trigger is loss of control and then my mind takes off at time-travel speed concocting all these scenarios of what could happen to him.  Fear is creative I guess, that’s my positive spin in this instance.

The understanding is layered and the four elements, although seemingly separate, are really enmeshed together.  

Trust myself.  When a child, protective measures from my parents not allowing me to explore as freely as I desired took root.  How I am with my dog is an extension of that behaviour process I picked up subconsciously.  Let it be known I am not ignorant to the rational of protectiveness, my point is that there is a healthy balance ( not necessarily an easy task either).  If I cannot trust myself how can I trust in general?  Faith is being ok with not being perfect, being ok with the understanding that errors will be made as is true of the converse, successes will be achieved too.

Let go. Trust the process.  I don’t have to have everything workout to my exact plan to achieve a desired outcome.

Breathe.  Observe.  Listen with my heart, see with my heart, feel with my heart.    Give my mind a time out.  Breathe again.

Faith.  Everything will be as it will.  Choosing positive is always better but there are times for sorrow, grief, anger, desire.  Be with those emotions and refrain from judgment, it only creates a mental vicious circle.  When my emotions run rampant, I don’t see clearly, there is a bigger picture and it’s ok to not know how things may be.  

Mustang loves to sniff.  He’s an explorer enjoying the adventure of nasal stimulus.  He prefers being off-leash and goes where the scents lead him, sometimes to my chagrin.  Believe it or not, after my leash trigger ‘aha’ moment,  the expansion challenges of my comfort zone has led to a better bond and subtle improvements in my everyday coping.


AA – 1 Step
April 17, 2015


“Ever have one of those days when…”

As someone just mentioned, there’s always something to be optimistic about even when having one of those days.   How lucky am I to have witnessed a double rainbow?

As above, so below.  As within, so without


Nature’s Insight – Great Blue Heron
April 16, 2015

Blue Heron

Word play deconstruction ahead:

First Word

insight – in(wards) sight to nature (my own).  Insight – a ‘gift’ (deeper understanding, liberation, etc),  insight – it, whatever it is, is within grasp (ironic within means inside ).

Second Word

Self – love.  Now love is not singularly definable from a being perspective.  What I mean is that when we are being..whatever it is in the moment, love comes in many colours.  Today’s was Great Blue Heron.

Great Blue Heron Symbolism

Self – determination.  Self – reliance.  These are attributes of self – love which I will elaborate on momentarily.


Wannabe Beach Bums – New weekly feature – Dose of Vitamin M
April 13, 2015 I have a tendency to be deep, pensive and sometimes too introverted (in case you haven’t noticed that from my writing and poetry).  In recent times there has been a heightened awareness of my heart centre and things like vulnerability, unconditional love, compassion and so on.  Let it not be forgotten that this internal fountain of youth within us is connected to enjoying life and indulging in humour.  With that being said, I like to have fun as much as the next person and more so lately since I’ve given my anal retentiveness a serious kick to the curb.    I am blessed with a dog who acts as a buffer for me.  He’s a walking billboard that flashes “Why so serious?” on some occasions, “Let’s play” on others.

So, in keeping with this adventure of maintaining and finding balance from a fun perspective, I’m introducing a new feature – Weekly Dose of Vitamin M – featuring my chocolate lab, Mustang!

Today he is accompanied by his one of his partners in crime, Corona…


Tomorrow…not so sure … may have to call ‘Puppy 911’ after this natural gas explosion.



The Little Kid Under the Bed
April 13, 2015


When I was small I got spooked easily.  Watching the old Frankenstein or Dracula movies were enough to petrify me and I would hide and sleep under my parents bed.  The first few times I did, I had to sneak and do it because it was something my parents forbade me from doing.  It was tough as a little child to be sleeping downstairs on the main floor by myself while they and my sister slept upstairs in their rooms.  I never realized until this moment how this made me feel so alone and vulnerable.  Nor did I understand how it formed part of a pattern of stifling communication when I’m vulnerable because I won’t ask for help when I’m in this state because of the negative compliance implications (rejection) and due to the result of not fully understanding things from my parents perspective which was well meaning.  Today that little kid was peering out from underneath the bed in pretty dramatic fashion.



The Equalizer
April 11, 2015

unnamed copy

An equalizer can mean many things; sometimes it’s a reference to balancing things out, can be an instrument to make music sound better, ebb and flow in the sense that somedays are better than others or an interesting line in a movie that after some conversation sparks this post.

I’m blessed with some great things in my life and recently one of them has been to instruct and lead a meditation group at Anchored Social Club in Toronto.  This past Tuesday evening was another special evening shared with 7 great people.  During the discussion post-meditation, Ben Dussault, owner of the fitness club, presented the question of how to take the effects of the session into everyday living, like doing  “homework”.



Every Breaking Wave part 1
March 31, 2015


Been putting together a number of written pieces and the song by U2, especially their live version from European Music Awards – which is so passionate – has converged with and influenced a number of insights in my life.

The end result, something being integrated into my meditation workshops and will become part of an upcoming book / guide dedicated to self-love and awareness is the following  piece.

It could be a personal mantra, an awareness activator for prayer and introspection that I use and came to understand in my own exploration of esteem issues and everyday functioning.


You are loved
You are wanted
You are unique
You are welcomed
You are needed
You are appreciated
It is safe to love
It is safe to be loved
It is safe to be in love
Give yourself a big hug, in front of the mirror preferably 🙂
picture taken at Huntington Beach

The End and the Beginning – Part 4 of 4 in Cocooning, the end of Me series
January 13, 2015

Final dedication is at the end of the poem.

first beard selfie  second beard selfie

Never had a beard before and for some reason felt it was appropriate to this concept and process of cocooning.

Downward Inward Upward Outward Spiral

Home sweet ummm

Maybe not



Is officially

Where I have


And it


That is going

To change (more…)

Open Door – Cocooning, the end of Me part 3 of 4
January 12, 2015

Dedication to a great host, while in California, is at the end of this.


last ocean meditation

Would you
Upon deep
There is no such
Thing as
A heart that is


Pilgrimage – part 2 of 4 of Cocooning, the end of me
January 11, 2015



Enter into
The dream,
Land of living
Oceans, mountains, desert